You Might be a Cuckold If

Wednesday, April 4, 2012


In the spirit of my recent tweets, this laundry list of “you might be a cuckold if” situations has been a long time in coming. So, little cucks and hot wives, here are just a few signs to look out for, if you're curious about what's going on with your sexuality.

You might be a cuckold if...

You get more excited by your wife looking at porn than you do looking at it yourself.

You hear her say “dinner's served,” and then you get on your knees and put your face under her skirt.

The only time you hear your lady moan is when it's over the phone, after she dials you from the motel while fucking her latest bull.

Your wife's cell has the premium plan thanks to all her male contacts. And you get turned on paying the big bill.

You're more awe struck by the thought of famous rappers' cocks buried in your wife's bare womb, rather than their music.

You not only handed off your girlfriend to another man during the senior prom dance, but you loved it.

You send your kids away to college right away to have the house free for her lovers.

Your weekly wet dream is the only time you cum while she's in the bed, leaving a real mess in your cock cage.

Seeing the Victoria's Secret catalogue does nothing for you. Imagining those panties smeared with strange cum or wrapped around your own ass, however...

Your late night snack comes in a warm, tight package, wrapped in her finest lingerie.

You appreciate the taste of your neighbor's cum more than his stylish new car.

You raise a drunken toast to her for putting out the finest pussy a guy could want, and your male friends nod their heads enthusiastically as they raise their glasses.

Your wife has tons of erotic pictures of herself on your hard drive, and you didn't take any of them.

You don't want to adopt a mixed race baby, but you want to raise one with your wife anyway. She smiles and calls up her Somali lover.

You ask the chef at your local cafe to hold the banana in the cream pie, and your wife rushes off to the kitchen.

Her wedding ring needs to be replaced every couple years. Even the best silver and gold gets tarnished by huge quantities of cum after awhile, and your pathetic salary can't afford the best.

You're more interested in seeing her through the lens of your new high tech camera with another man, rather than having your friend take the pics as you fuck her.

Having a threesome means watching her fuck two well hung black bulls while you're on the outside, looking in.

More than half of the ebooks on your new Kindle or iPad are stories with titles like Breeding Cuckold Wife Natalie.

Celebrating your wedding anniversary means buying the drinks for your wife and her bull, and then listening to them fuck upstairs, while you jerk off on the sofa.

You're reading this post and getting a little (or very) turned on.

If any of these scenarios excite you, then it's time to man up and face the inevitable. That is, if your genetic programming allows you to.

The world is shrieking one thing, right in your face: you, my friend, are a cuckold.

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